By Kimberly Krautter
The only thing more banal than Friday's (ersatz) debate was the performance of the so-called "Chief Strategists" of the Obama and McCain campaigns as they appeared yesterday on "Meet The Press". These Sunday Fauntleroys were more scripted than a petit prince in a starched collar.
So, in case you had something more important to do like reconcile your check book against the line of credit keeping the roof over your head, here's a recap:
The esteemed Mr. Brokaw did the late Russert proud by making a very swift cut-to-the-chase by declaring moot any discussion of who won/lost the Friday contest. Instead, he asked if either candidate was happy about the "agreement" on the latest Wall Street bailout program.
First up, McCain's proxy, Mister Steve Schmidt. His answer (and, mind you, this is a direct quote translated into American English for those who don't speak Beltway):
"Blah, blah, blah, blather. My guy saved the day in the greatest strategic move since Alexander crossed Hellespoint. Blah, blah, my guy is a MAVERICK, A-N-D even the House GOP loves him. Blah, blah, blah."
Pivoting with the precision of a Dean Smith baller in an NCAA tourney, Mister David Axelrod for Team Obama countered with this pithy retort (again, translated for your convenience).
"Blah, Blah, blah, talking point, talking point, talking point. Because our guy is smarter than your guy, blah, blah, blah-blah-blah. Talking point. Blah."
Well, Brokaw in all of his journalistic eminence was not about to let these two talking heads get away with THAT! So with a swift, stolid query that telegraphed, "I knew you guys would say that, and I was ready for you, so TAKE THAT!" He asked, (translated):
"So the conservative sounding board and Bushy-ite champion the Wall Street Journal says that both of your candidates stunk up the place last Friday. What do you say about that. Huh? "
To which Axelrod -- with a ramrod straight sense of confidence -- said, "Blah, blah, blah, BLATHER! Talking point, talking point, talking point. Blah, blather," with a look that said, "So there, Brokaw."
Not to be outdone, Mister Schmidt said, "I'm utterly changing the subject. Ha, ha, ha! Bet you didn't see THAT one coming! I want to completely distract you from that embarassing line of questioning because I know my guy STUNK THE ROOM UP last Friday and looked like a neutered Dan Quayle, so I'm going to keep talking as long as it takes for Russert to roll in his grave and tap Brokaw on the shoulder..."
O.K. readers... I don't think you need the entire transcript to get the point. So, at least this year the distinction between the two brands -- er, I mean, candidates -- exceeds the choice between Coke and Pepsi. But what do we really have here? With only 41 days to go, and early voting already at the disposal of a large swatch of the citizen population, could God, Allah or Quetzacoatl tell The Body Politic if our choice is more finely drawn than between a Seussian "Thing 1 and Thing 2"?
Honestly, considering recent signs that we have indeed entered the 9th circle of Hell, it seems that we are choosing between two equally destructive forces after whom we -- the taxpayers/voters AND our GREAT grandchildren -- are going to have to clean up.
Bitter, party of one. Bitter! Your table is ready...
So, here's my own political calculus this year: It's the History-thing, stupid!
My beloved America is but an infant of history, but in our oh-so-brief 221 years on the geo-political globe, we have made quite the impact. And accordingly, in times of crisis and tumult, our body politic has found respite in signs and symbols around which we rally our resolve. To wit, I humbly offer this: At the risk of being accused of ageism, I pick Obama. It's not an age-thing, rather a generation-thing.
Obama may not have the depth of chronological experience nor the military resume, but he does represent (symbolize) and hearken a new generation of thinking; one that is agnostic on the distracting issues of race, gender, creed, or social status. An Obama presidency would, in sharp relief, provide a signal to our own populace as well as to the world, that America has moved beyond the bugaboos of our history (those pesky inconsistencies between rhetoric and reality) to usher in a new way of thinking that has less to do with past glories and more to do with a future that embraces the inner-Republic of all nations.
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